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so we talk and I have a company annual party in and that i would be going by myself. He offers to be my date and i said not a good idea as my friends be there since they work with me and he is not exactly popular with them he understood. I did not want any gossip or drama at the really great first class party my boss had put together. We get together again a week later for dinner and I cannot help but bring up the incident with my friend and still bothers me, I cannot trust him, and we have nothing without trust. He asks me if I am open to ever getting back together and that he really fucked up and that I would be able to trust him. I told him I dont know I have to think about it but I told him I am still really hurt over the cheating and he also helped dissolve a friendship and basiy put me through hell emotionally. He humiliated me in front of a bunch of mutual friends and this former friend also stirred up some drama regarding it and she fails to really take any responsibility and says she was a grieving widow..blah blah in a bad spot and still thinks she was doing me a favor by telling me she slept with him. He tells me he is tired of fighting about this whole thing and does not want to discuss it with me any further. If we are going to move forward we are going to have to put the past behind us. I am still shocked and hurt over the betrayal. I told him I dont think our relationship ever be the same and he got mad and dropped me off at home. I have not even bothered to contact him and last night after over a week he texts me "Hi". I ignore him. A part of me believe it or not wants to be a normal couple again. Most of me though is burned out. I realize I probably never meet a guy like him again amd wonder if I ever meet a guy I am super attracted too, good in bed, and extremely well which is what this guy is and he knows how to use it. No guy has come close to him in length, stamina or performance and every guy i date I find myself comparig them to him. I know this is a mess and so am I. Are we doomed forever and deep down I know I need to blow this guy off forever but It is hard.
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